Phoenix groups host trans-inclusive pool parties for safety

The pool is calling: During Arizona summers, it’s practically a requirement to lounge next to a body of water, no matter the size. From plastic backyard buckets to the mother of pearl-lined pool at The Phoenician, the state is as known for its poolside hangouts as its scorching heat.

But for queer people — especially gender-nonconforming folks — a pool party isn't as simple as “show up as you are.” Many feel a need to be "stealth," a community term for trans individuals who hide aspects of their bodies to avoid outing themselves, whether pre- or post-surgery, or regardless of whether they want gender-affirming medical interventions at all.

In places where clothing is minimal, being unable to go stealth can make showing up safely feel impossible. That’s why groups across Arizona are creating spaces — both public and private — where people can rock a two-piece and a bulge, swim shorts and top surgery scars, or anything else without fear of harassment.

That’s the idea behind FreeBirdz, an East Valley-based community group founded by Shane Fey, who organizes trans and nonbinary meetups, markets — and, of course, summer pool parties.

To make them accessible, Fey covers the costs out of his own pocket and hosts the gatherings at group members’ homes.

“The idea is we can just feel comfortable swimming,” Fey says. “When we're with each other, we don’t have to worry about if our shirt is on or off, if we packed, if we tucked, if we binded, if we didn't.”

For Fey, being in a supportive environment was life-changing.

“A lot of what held me back was my own self,” he says. “But I had to be in a comfortable space first to realize — oh, it is okay. Who cares what they think?”

Creating spaces where trans folks can relax without self-monitoring is crucial, says Mirtha Garcia Reyes, an Arizona State University part-time associate professor and applied researcher who recently earned a Ph.D. in sociocultural anthropology.

“In order to make everyone feel included, we need initiatives that help welcome the trans community in ways they feel seen and heard,” Garcia Reyes says.

Part of her dissertation work explored whether policies and programs supporting the trans community worldwide support a variety of trans communities. She sees trans-specific events as a starting point for building self-confidence.

“You don't have to self-censor or monitor yourself. It's an aspect of safety,” she said. “Spaces like these let you be who you are without worrying about how others might try to police you.”

Still, many trans people dream of a day when safety doesn't require seeking out special spaces.

“For safety reasons, a lot of people want to go stealth,” said Skyler Tuholsky-Froke, a board member facilitator at Trans Spectrum of Arizona and the Queer Center. “Things like scars, facial hair or a lack of bulge can unintentionally out someone, and in intimate spaces like pools, that can be very scary.”

Founded in 2014, Trans Spectrum of Arizona is a volunteer nonprofit that hosts support meetings, offers resources and connects trans and gender-expansive peers. Their pool parties, hosted at FOUND:RE Phoenix Hotel, aim to remind attendees that society’s perception of their bodies shouldn’t prevent joy.

“I think it’s important for us to know we can still take up space in public,” Tuholsky-Froke says. “We want to say: ‘Hey, that’s their problem — not yours.’”

The goal, they said, is for trans folks to enjoy themselves without feeling surveilled.

“You want people to feel they belong, no matter where they are in their transition, whether they've had surgeries, medical treatment, or none of those things,” they says. “It’s a beautiful thing.”

Details on this year’s trans pool party are expected soon.

Meanwhile, FreeBirdz already had their first pool party this past May, and local queer and trans women’s group Lezbe Friends also sold out its annual pool bash at the newly renovated Ibiza Lounge at The Pemberton.

“I just want to stress how important it is to find that community — whether it's FreeBirdz or your own,” Fey says. “Surround yourself with people who love and support you. There’s nothing that beats that. Together, everything can be accomplished.”