The most degrading moment in my life was when a peanut bounced off my head in a bar. It led to the only resolution I can remember actually sticking to. Teakwoods was a great bar. Sports were on, food was served late, and drinks were cheap. It was close to…
I’ve always had a love-hate relationship with truth. As an only child with a vivid imagination, lying came easy. By junior high, I was an expert forger, using carbon paper and an old typewriter to change report card grades and signing permission slips as if they were faux Van Goghs…
Last year, for once, I really had a resolution for the New Year, and I had to find a way to make it stick. It was not the kind of resolution you bring up in casual conversation. I resolved to devote more time to my faith life. As a practicing…
It was the perfect storm: Christmas, a Target Visa card, and a coupon worth 10 percent off my entire purchase. I set off one crisp November morning with the best intentions — to get an early jump on my Christmas shopping and save a few bucks in the process. What…
The tough Valley chicks take on the babes from the beach. Sat., Jan. 24, 7 p.m., 2009…
Take that slinky thang out of the closet and take it out on the town for this Raven Events-sponsored do featuring music, dancing, food, and drink specials. Sat., Jan. 24, 8 p.m.-2 a.m., 2009…
The experimental, multimedia presentation by Backwards Theatre explores the concept of life after death — or, as the folks at this “cultural laboratory” put it, “the longest long distance call to somebody we could ever make.” Sat., Jan. 24, 8 p.m., 2009…
Every time one of my friends starts thinking about cheating on her boyfriend or husband, she calls me. With good reason. I’ve been there, and I’ve done that. My friends know I’d never judge them. But it’s funny how predictable my advice has become. “I don’t know what to do,”…
Left to my own motivation, I don’t tend to follow through on things I decide to start doing. My legs don’t get tan (1973); I don’t exercise (1994-present); I don’t tweak the script of my one-woman show (2004-present). I haven’t learned to fly. In junior high, I thought if I…
It’s easy being “green” in Phoenix, from xeriscaping and carrying chic reusable grocery bags to giving up meat for good. After I had tipped the scales at almost 400 pounds and admitted to a massive daily intake of soda, cigarettes, and fast food, the physician wasn’t pleased. “If you don’t make…
Promises, promises. It’s almost the end of January. How many resolutions have you broken so far in 2009? This year, we resolved to tell you only the stories of personal promises kept. I’ll begin with my own. Last August, I resolved to complete a marathon. I’d never done such a…
We like to hike at night, but last time out, we’re pretty sure we saw a zombie gnawing on some fresh man meat. Or it could’ve been a rock formation. At any rate, if you have any sort of qualms about the dark, don’t go on this kinda-creepy pitch-black trip…
We have some pretty sick fantasies, but none ever centered on staring at the night sky through a telescope, especially when it’s freezing out. Undaunted hat- and scarf-wearers and general-punishment gluttons can rendezvous at the secluded Estrella Mountain Regional Park for the Dark Sky Telescope Hike, a 3.7-mile jaunt up…
Big-name drag racers like Tony Pedregon, Cruz Pedregon, John Force, Del Worsham, Tony Schumacher, Brandon Bernstein, and Hillary Will are scheduled to be in Phoenix for this fan-friendly NHRA preseason tuneup event. Fri., Jan. 23; Sat., Jan. 24; Sun., Jan. 25, 2009…
Unless “green” is on your words-not-to-utter list for 2009, you should check out this two-day expo, featuring reps from various environmentally friendly vendors and businesses. Sat., Jan. 24, 10 a.m.-5 p.m.; Sun., Jan. 25, 10 a.m.-5 p.m., 2009…
For centuries, golf has been a game of class and distinction. A gentleman’s sport in which deals are struck and lifelong alliances formed. At least that’s what golfers tell us. But at the end of the day, a game that dull is more likely a chance for a bunch of…
There may be nothing new under the sun, but back in late 1978, four skinny British kids named David Haskins, Kevin Haskins, Peter Murphy, and Daniel Ash cooked up something totally unprecedented beneath the Northampton gloom. The band was Bauhaus. The foreboding, atmospheric sound was eventually dubbed gothic rock. Music…
Whenever we try to be sexy, we inevitably end up knocking over stacks of high-priced china. Still, there’s hope. Every Saturday, Scandalesque co-founder and “Queen of the Blazing Bustier” Pyra Sutra whips brainy types like us into hot-for-teacher doppelgängers with her Art of the Tease burlesque workshop at Team Yoga…
Laying outside in a T-shirt and shorts in the dead of winter is one of the benefits of surviving Phoenix summers. One downside? Unless you want to drive for six hours, there isn’t a wave-worthy body of water around. Instead of being bummed out, hit the beach, at least sonically,…
We love monster trucks. No, wait. Before you break up with us, understand that it’s completely gratifying to witness these growling behemoths, weighing upward of 9,000 pounds and standing more than 10 feet tall, grinding regular, steel-body autos into tin cans before breaking into a frenzy of freestyling donuts. It’s…
You hate fashion. However, as you pull on your tube socks and tuck your Far Side T-shirt into your leather-belted khaki shorts, you are, believe it or not, making one helluva “fashion” statement. Take it a little more seriously — will ya? — by checking out the premiere of Tiffe…
By the mid-21st century, repossession of organs right out of deadbeat transplant recipients will be legal. That’s the gruesome premise behind the 2008 film Repo! The Genetic Opera, which returns to Chandler Cinemas (where it played in December) as part of the Repo! Road Tour 3. Darren Lynn Bousman from…
