Feathered Bastard

Live from the Banana Republic: Video of People Being Arrested for Applauding

Ever wanna see someone get arrested for clapping? Well, here you go.

As a community service, I give you your government in action, folks: the Maricopa County Board of Supervisors allowing sheriff's deputies to arbitrarily arrest people for applauding at a public meeting. Tell you the truth, after watching this stuff, it's hard to feel any sympathy for Supervisor Don "The Mullet" Stapley and his 118 counts. Here's hoping you kiss the mat, Don, like Leon Spinks used to back in the day.

And as for Chairman Andy Kunasek, who bears an uncanny resemblance to Obergruppenführer Reinhard Heydrich, minus the uniform (look him up, people), one can only suggest that those kneepads he's got on for Sheriff Joe look like they're wearing a bit around the edges. So he should probably have them replaced. He needs to keep fellating Joe and letting the MCSO arrest innocent civilians willy-nilly. Otherwise, Joe and his political rear-end friend Candy Thomas will find 118-counts for his sorry ass, too.

Talk about lame excuses...Kunasek, you are the weakest link.

Max Wilson? The guy's arteries are so hard, he might as well be an exhibit in the Natural History museum next to the Paleozoic era. Fulton Brock? Well, we all remember Foghorn Leghorn's stab at greatness: secretly taping a sit-down between himself and members of the citizens group MCSA. You can never be too careful with those citizens groups, Brock. Especially when you're slower than a stone fence yourself.

Finally, Mary Rose to the rescue!

As for Supervisor Mary Rose Wilcox, she freakin' comes off as the voice of reason. A patient den mother to this hapless clown patrol. How she deals on a daily basis with her co-workers Moe, Larry, Curly, and Shemp is a conundrum we'll never figure out. She may not be perfect, but she certainly shines by comparison, and if you ever want to talk to her, all you have to do is catch lunch down at El Portal. Or leave a message there with hubby Earl.

In any case, enjoy the vids. And stay tuned next month for the further adventures of Mayberry R.F.D., aka, the Maricopa County Board of Stupidvisors, brought to you by your county tax dollars, chumps.

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Stephen is a former staff writer and columnist at Phoenix New Times.
Contact: Stephen Lemons