Sheriff Joe Arpaio Impersonator Posts Funny Updates on Twitter


There's no way it can be the real Sheriff Joe Arpaio on Twitter -- we doubt he's anywhere near tech-savvy enough to micro-blog on a social networking site with applications like "Twitterfox" and "Twim," and the Twitter updates he's been posting are way too funny to come from a guy who's perpetually scowling and grumbling.

But somebody has opened a Twitter account as Sheriff Joe Arpaio, claiming on the page that he's "proudly keeping watch over the great Maricopa County," and making posts that poke fun at the real sheriff.

The first Twitter update from the account was posted on February 9. It read: "My doctor says I need to stop passing by landscaping trucks else I triple my risk of stroke."

Some of the other updates "Joe Arpaio" has posted:

February 10: "Do black people eat oatmeal?"

February 11: "When Mike Tyson did his time we decided to cut the bologna into ear-shaped pieces. Unfortunately he was not amused at our hospitality."

February 20: "Reprimand of the day: It's not appropriate to tell rookie guards. 'Nothing says shut the hell up like a taser to the taint.'"

February 24: "Guard Reprimand Today: 'Don't taunt inmates by asking them over the loudspeaker if they'd like to give up green bologna for Lent.'"

And hey, New Times and our Feathered Bastard even get some shout-outs from the pseudo-Joe:

February 11: "Stephen Lemons is wrong. 'Tree trimmers' are just as responsible for murders as U.S. citizens are. They're killing the values of our nation."

February 12: "If anyone who is following me thinks the Phoenix New Times is a legitimate source of news, please let me know immediately."

We don't know who the joker impersonating Sheriff Joke is, but we sure do appreciate a little levity from Planet Arpaio -- even if it's fake.

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