Yesterday, Coachella released the lineup for April's festival. Highlighted by three headliners, AC/DC, Jack White, and Drake, the EDM-heavy list of acts has sparked derision and applause, as it does every year and will until the festival loses relevancy. But it got us thinking back to Coachellas past, where Phoenix triumphantly bathes in the runoff from the festival. Before, during, and after the festival, bands hop on I-10 and make the trip down to play shows in Phoenix. If they haven't already, we're betting local concert promoters are scrambling to secure concerts with the best names coming to Indio, California, this year. Here are some that we hope come to Phoenix, as well.
OK, we're not sure Tame Impala has *ever* played Metro Phoenix, let alone in the past year. The Australian band's breakthrough album, Lonerism, came out in late 2012, and more than two years later, we here in the Valley of the Sun are sick of waiting for the opportunity to see them live. If the band doesn't make the four-hour drive to Phoenix during Coachella, we're going to take it personally.
Hip-hop's shit-slinger extraordinaire is a phenomenally talented rapper, and we're starting to feel like Phoenix isn't cool enough for her. Come on, Ms. Banks -- we may not have tall skyscrapers or population density, but Phoenix knows how to have a good time, we swear.
Raekwon and Ghostface Killah
If you haven't read Ghostface Killah's annual Softest Rappers in the Game list, go ahead and do yourself a favor and read it right now. Sure, the concept of rappers being "soft" is dangerous and indicative of a toxic pissing contest in hip-hop, but that list is just so goddamn funny. (There's no better way to start off a list than this incantation: "Allow yaself to caress the luxurious fur sofas n velvet walls of these paragraphs.") Ghostface is many things, and a master of the English language is one of them. Anyways, we're hoping some eagle-eyed TMZ photographer manages to catch Drake and Ghostface in the same room, since Ghostface has figuratively banged Drake's nuts on a dresser with a spiked bat for years now. Check out how Ghostface skewered Drake this year:
I still refuse to believe this nigga Drake was born thru any kinda normal human birth or anything like that... Feel like this nigga jus appeared on a lilypad one morning in a pond in his moms back yard inside of a dewdrop or some shit. I picture this nigga asleep inside of a drop of sunshine gently slidin down a golden maple tree from one leaf to the next one morning n then falling onto the wing of a canary n bein carried off on a feather n whimsically slippin down to that pond surrounded by swans n geese n squirrels bathing n shit...n then his moms was hearin these little squeakin sounds n stepped off her patio where she was enjoyin her rose hip tea n poppyseed bagel n seen this thumb sized winged hamster witta afro in her pond n carried it into the house n put it inside of a shoebox on top of a bed of cotton balls n babys breath n knitted little leotards n hats for it. Anyways Im pretty sure that shit gotta be at least 80% accurate...
Regardless, Ghostface and Raekwon are obviously legends in their own rights, so here's hoping they come to Phoenix.
Todd Terje and the Olsens
Todd Terje's real name is Todd Olsen, and so maybe... he will perform live with a band of family members? Maybe Mary Kate and Ashley will grab instruments for the show? We're not sure we understand the booking here, but all we know is that It's Album Time is that rare crossover electronic album that even the most pure rockist can get behind. The Norwegian producer hasn't come to Phoenix, and now he has a great opportunity.
The Weeknd last played Phoenix in 2012, and we figure Abel Tesfaye is about due for another trip. Remember when sexy, makeout R&B sucked? The Weeknd enabled you to enjoy kisses and the music you play to set the mood. Phoenix really needs to get in the mood, so here's hoping The Weeknd plays a weekday show in Phoenix in April.
Speaking of dark, sexy R&B, FKA Twigs has yet to grace a Metro Phoenix stage with her brooding, sultry presence. It's about time that happened, don't you think? I'll be in my bunk.
When alt-J played Tucson in November, we here in the Valley started to feel a little left out. Here's hoping that oversight on behalf of alt-J's booking agent happened because the band planned on announcing a Phoenix show sometime around Coachella weekend. It hasn't happened yet, but there's still hope.
It's hard not to get hooked by Demarco's dreamy, euphoric soft-rock. Last time the singer-songwriter came through town in 2012, he played Trunk Space, and now he's playing Coachella. Not a bad career progression.
Speaking of Canadians, Lights is like the perfect pop star. Interesting, synth-driven instrumentals. Crescent Ballroom would be the perfect place to see her live, just sayin'.
OK, we went the whole list without mentioning a headliner. AC/DC would be great to see live, and Drake just played Phoenix a few months ago, but Jack White would be a treat. He's one of the best guitarists of his generation and has written enough great songs to fill a greatest hits album, and he's only 39. Whatever project he does is bound to be interesting, and as a producer, he possesses a Midas touch. Let's hope he makes it here.
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