The Guilty Pleasure: Oreo Biscuits Where to Get It: Church's Chicken Price: 99 cents for 5 What it Really Costs: A sugar crash, as well as the time and thought to redefine what you consider a biscuit.
There's nothing biscuit-like about the Oreo Biscuits at Church's (we're noticing a trend here), but there's also nothing wrong with them.
When we heard that you can get five for under a dollar, we assumed that they weren't going to be the size of a normal biscuit, but we figured they'd have some biscuit-like qualities.
In all honesty, Oreo Biscuits would be more appropriately called Oreo Doughnut Holes, but we suppose that wouldn't fit so well with fried chicken. That said, if you consider how delicious Oreo-flavored doughnut holes would be, you understand how delicious these are.
We Believe Local Journalism is Critical to the Life of a City
Engaging with our readers is essential to Phoenix New Times's mission. Make a financial contribution or sign up for a newsletter, and help us keep telling Phoenix's stories with no paywalls.
Support Our Journalism
When they're fresh, the Oreo Biscuits (doughnut holes) are warm and slightly crunchy on the outside, with a light and fluffy (although grey). Combine that with the warm sugary glaze (think devil's food donuts) on the outside of each bite, and 99 cents gets you five bite-sized spheres of over-sweetened delightfulness.
They might not be as good cold, but we had to wait for ours to be made (and then to cool off), so we weren't willing to wait long enough to find out what they're like at room temperature. Honestly, the worst thing about them is the mildly repulsive insulation-like grey coloring on the inside of each "biscuit."
It might be tempting to buy the pack of 20, but we recommend not eating them all yourself unless you're prepared to deal with a serious sugar rush (and probably diabetes, decades later). If you're looking for a quick sweet snack and only looking to spend a dollar, you can add these to your rotation.