10 Tinder Tips for Women
"Guess which person you're supposed to be looking at" is about the worst game you can play on Tinder.
Whether you use the social media/online dating platform known as Tinder, you've probably at least heard about it by now.
For the three of you who don't know what it is, Tinder is an app that allows you to communicate with people with whom you have a mutual attraction (based on geography, a few photos, and a short description).
Generally speaking, guys take a lot of crap for making fools out of themselves on Tinder, but the truth is that the ladies do some things just as badly as the dudes. Here are 10 tips for women using Tinder.
See also: 10 Tinder Tips for Guys
10. Do have more than one photo.
Considering that Tinder is primarily based on visuals, it only makes sense that you'd have more than one photo. A single photo makes it seem like you took one really good picture and that's the only thing you have going, whereas a few photos will give us a better idea of what you actually look like (not accounting for angles, lighting, and Photoshop). Also, if you only have one photo, it looks like your account is fake.
9. Do have at least one photo that's not a selfie.
It's cool to have some selfies for your photos, but make sure that you include at least one that isn't. For one thing, it's generally pretty tough to see someone as a whole in a selfie (unless that person has ridiculously long arms), and for another, there's no saying how you might've manipulated yourself in that photo. A single photo taken by someone else can give a better perspective of your appearance, and it says that you're not just sitting at home all the time taking selfies.
8. Don't only have group photos.
You know what's a major red flag on Tinder? People who exclusively have photos of groups of people. We get it, you and your girlfriends take photos together every time you get dressed up, but we're not really looking to play "guess which one I'm looking at" on every photo. It's fine to include a group photo or two, but if they're all group shots then we're just going to assume you're always the ugly one in the group.
We considered not even censoring this one since you can't see her face anyway, but that cloud looks like it'd be an awesome date.
7. Don't post photos of just your body if you're looking for a relationship.
It's cool to show some cleavage or leg on Tinder, maybe even in a lingerie shot. That is, if you're looking for guys who just want to hook up. But if you're on the hunt for Mr. Right (which is a bold ambition on Tinder), then you may want to cover up a little bit and/or actually include your face in a photo. We would never tell you not to show off your body, but we're absolutely telling you not to solely show off your body if you want guys to want you for more than your body.
6. Do say something more than "Hey :)".
We know how hard it can be to break the ice in messages after you match with someone on Tinder, but you should really have something a little better than "Hey :)" lined up. Maybe it's as simple as giving us a compliment about what you liked in our photos/bio, or maybe it's just letting us know of a common interest you noticed we shared. Pretty much anything is better than "Hey :)", and quite a few guys out there will give you bonus points for dropping a joke or awesome pop culture reference as an opener.
You know what every guy totally wants to see? Another dude with the girl they're considering talking to.
5. Don't take yourself too seriously.
When you get right down to it, the premise of Tinder is borderline ridiculous. You're literally swiping away people whom you're not interested in based on a short paragraph and a few photos. There's just no reason to treat it like life and death -- or act like you're so much better than everyone else on there. If you have fun and joke around with guys, you're going to have a way more enjoyable Tinder experience, and you'll probably find yourself to be a lot luckier with the guys you get matched with as well. No one wants a cranky date, so don't come off as one in your profile.
4. Don't post photos with other guys.
This should probably be obvious, but if you have a bunch of photos with other guys, then it's going to look like you're either in a relationship or just like to sleep around a lot. We're not saying you can't have any photos with your brothers or male friends or something, but make sure the photo makes it pretty clear that you're not with the person. You wouldn't want to see photos of us with some random chick, would you? Also, probably 99 percent of girls who post a bunch of pictures with dudes and justify it with "all my friends are guys" are either lying or insane, so it's just safer to count them out.
3. Do have yourself in the main photo.
We understand that you're trying to show us how spiritual and white you are by posting a quote from Gandhi with an infinity symbol as one of your Tinder photos, and we've learned to accept that as part of the package. No matter how inspirational or motivational the positive quote written on the side of your pumpkin spice latte might be, the point of Tinder is to see what you look like, so include yourself alongside the Starbucks cup. Guys will pretend to care about the quote you post, just don't make it your primary photo.
See also: 10 Signs You're a Side Chick
There are some creepy things on Tinder, but creepy things about Tinder in the real world might be even worse.
Dennis Bocquet / Flickr
2. Don't misrepresent yourself.
Let's get one thing straight, there are a lot of guys on Tinder. They're not all winners, but there's a good chance that someone who sees you on there will like you for you. One thing that turns a lot of guys off is deception, so while we're not telling you to lay out all the cards in your bio, you shouldn't intentionally pretend to be something you're not. Sure, there's no way for a dude to know if you're lying to him early on, but if you intend to make someone into more than a short-term fling, then you should probably start things off by admitting what you're actually like on Tinder. Don't claim to be a diehard sports fan if you've never watched a game before. Don't pretend to be living by yourself if you're in your parents' basement with your two kids. Don't pretend to be single if you're actually in a relationship. Stuff like that rubs some men the wrong way.
1. Do remember that, as long as you're remotely attractive, you'll get plenty of attention.
We've never personally had the experience, but we imagine that most of life for an average-looking (or better) woman is fending off guys trying to hit on you. Tinder is probably no different. If you ignore the first nine tips but still have a pretty face and a good body, you're still going to get selected by most of the men who come across your profile. At that point, it's just about sorting out the creeps, jerks, and losers from the guys who you might actually want to be with.
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