Arty Bollocks: Pre-Cooked Artist Statements in a Click | Jackalope Ranch | Phoenix | Phoenix New Times | The Leading Independent News Source in Phoenix, Arizona
Navigation

Arty Bollocks: Pre-Cooked Artist Statements in a Click

One new idea for every day in 2011. We're talking big, small, local, international, in action, and on the drawing board. Here's today's -- what's yours? If you're struggling to put together a statement for your next exhibition or a blurb for your website, look no further than Arty Bollocks. The...
Share this:

One new idea for every day in 2011. We're talking big, small, local, international, in action, and on the drawing board. Here's today's -- what's yours?

If you're struggling to put together a statement for your next exhibition or a blurb for your website, look no further than Arty Bollocks


The formulaic website was created by UK-based creative David James Ross, who wrote dozens of jargon-filled statements rooted in universality of myth, romance tourism, Bauhausian sensibilities, and skateboard ethics, with influences as diverse as Machiavelli, John Lennon, and Francis Bacon.

Arty Bullocks also creates artist certificates available for those who "occasionally produce works of art, study learned treatises on 'real artists', their qualities, achievements, practices and heroic struggles, for the purpose of understanding how hopelessly short of their standards you fall, constantly question, to yourself and others, whether you and your work are good enough to ever be a proper artist, mutter under your breath at least daily that someone will expose you soon, and cultivate brow-furrowing, chin-rubbing and other anxious mannerisms appropriate for artistic practice." 


 Find your own statement -- ready to confuse your audience in no time -- right here.




Follow Jackalope Ranch on Facebook and Twitter.



BEFORE YOU GO...
Can you help us continue to share our stories? Since the beginning, Phoenix New Times has been defined as the free, independent voice of Phoenix — and we'd like to keep it that way. Our members allow us to continue offering readers access to our incisive coverage of local news, food, and culture with no paywalls.