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Dear Teenage Girls, Do You Really Like These Tokio Hotel Dudes?

So I've never pretended to be an expert on the mind of the adolescent female, and I hate to sound like an out-of-touch old man, but I really don't get this Tokio Hotel thing. Last night at Phooson, they prompted a wave of shrieks at almost every turn, being topped only by Fall Out Boy's Pete Wentz, who is, of course, a well-established heartthrob who's had naked pictures circulated online and knocked up a semi-starlet. Tokio Hotel, though? It's very odd, indeed. The lead singer of the band, Bill Kaulitz, isn't so much androgynous as completely feminine and the rest of the guys just look like the sort of dirtballs who somehow manage to schedule nothing but shop classes their senior year.

I really can't pretend to understand, and neither could my plus one, who shared her own memories of screeching for the dreamy Gavin Rossdale at the radio shows of her youth, but was shocked to see the band all the girls interviewed on the radio were talking about.

So let's examine some photos...

Yes, this is the band the girls were going crazy for. Again, I'm not even sure these clothes are fashionable -- though certainly the bar is a little lower for Germans than the rest of us -- but, really, I can't imagine them being compared favorably to, say, My Chemical Romance, who almost caused a stampede at last year' Tempe Music Fest, when singer Gerard Way was being interviewed in a booth to the right of the stage. To my untrained eye, these guys look more like the sort of emo dandies the Hot Topic girls love.

So, yeah, I'd be happy to hear someone explain this to me. I mean, I'm not suggesting the girls out there have a crush on Lil Wayne or something, but, really, this Bill guy looks a lot more like Boy George than he does any other singer who's ever had modest success thanks to MTV exposure. Maybe I'm too young, but I don't remember girls crushing on him.

Call me an insufferable 90s'ist -- or point out that as a straight guy I don't get a vote on this -- but I'll take good ol' Gavin over that any day. 

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Martin Cizmar
Contact: Martin Cizmar