Get ready for a creepfest at The Crypt.
Get ready for a creepfest at The Crypt.
Courtesy of the Crypt Haunted Attractions

Best Things to Do This Weekend: Arizona Cardinal, She Loves Me, Cerberus Cup

Want to start Halloween a little early? This weekend, you can. Check out the haunted side of the Fiesta Mall with the Crypt Haunted Attractions or get lost in a corn maze at Tolmachoff Farms. For more things to do, visit Phoenix New Times' curated calendar.

The Crypt Haunted Attractions
If you scare people for a living, it’s important to convince them that this year will be the scariest yet. And although The Crypt Haunted Attractions is great at both being increasingly horrifying and seeming that way, we tell you what, those ghouls and so forth will have to go pretty far if they wanna scare us more than this year has.
Catharsis is healthy, so screaming it out in an appropriate venue sounds almost comforting. However, it won’t be — muah ha ha — as you experience the 2017 Nightmare Edition through Tuesday, October 31, featuring the Crypt, the Asylum, and Chaos Maze, at the possibly actually haunted Fiesta Mall, 1445 West Southern Avenue in Mesa.

Hours on Friday, September 29, are 7 to 10 p.m. Admission is $8 to $35, depending how much you can handle and whether you want to wait in line. Buy advance tickets or ask questions at Haunted AZ website. Julie Peterson

Who's going to take home the coveted improv prize?
Who's going to take home the coveted improv prize?
Jose Gonzalez

Cerberus Cup
September has five weekends this year. And that can only mean one thing: The local improv community will once again compete for the coveted Cerberus Cup. The tournament begins with three teams made up of three performers skilled in the art of spontaneity battling each other for laughs and your vote. Those with the most votes at the end of the three bouts will duke it out the next night for a cash prize and Cerberus Cup Championship glory.

Cast your vote starting at 8:30 p.m. on Friday, September 29, at The Torch Theatre, 4721 North Central Avenue. Admission for each bout is $10, and a pass for all three bouts for $15. For more information, visit the Torch Theatre website. Jason Keil

She Loves Me
After Sleepless in Seattle, Tom Hanks and Meg Ryan starred in You’ve Got Mail. It features two people falling in love on AOL. Old school! The storyline has a rich pedigree, starting with a 1937 Hungarian play, Parfumerie, and evolving through enough stage, screen, and musical versions to choke a horse. The tale of two pen-pal lovers who don’t know they know each other in real life also might have inspired “Escape (The Piña Colada Song).”

The very popular musical version She Loves Me is presented by Don Bluth Front Row Theatre through Saturday, November 4, at 8670 East Shea Boulevard, #103, in Scottsdale. Showtime is 7 p.m. for the performance on Friday, September 29, and tickets are $23 to $25 at 480-314-0841 or the Don Bluth Front Row Theatre website. Julie Peterson

Sometimes a face is the best canvas.EXPAND
Sometimes a face is the best canvas.
Pancakes & Booze Art Show

Pancakes & Booze
The flapjacks will be flying again this year, when the Pancakes & Booze art show returns to The Duce, 525 South Central Avenue. It’s a chance to satisfy both your eye for art and your culinary cravings, while mixing it up with fellow Phoenicians.

Event organizers put out the call for local artists, but they haven’t revealed whose work they’re showing. So at this point, there’s no telling what sort of artistic gems you might stumble on during this year’s gathering. Expect live performances, too.

Tickets for the age 21-and-over event start at $7 (for early birds), and the pancakes are free. The show starts at 8 p.m. on Friday, September 29, and runs until 2 a.m. Visit the Pancakes & Booze website. Lynn Trimble

Salvage Yard
During junking excursions, nothing is more exhilarating than finding a piece to complete a project or add to a collection. During the Salvage Yard at Rusty Saturday on Saturday, September 30, you can become a picker like Mike Wolfe or Frank Fritz.

The monthly sale, held in a warehouse behind the store, has a variety of rustic, vintage, industrial, antique, and repurposed items, including furniture, home decor, and spare project parts.

Founded by three self-proclaimed “junkers,” the warehouse sale caters to homeowners working on DIY projects and shoppers looking for vintage items to decorate with.

The monthly event runs from 7 a.m. to 1 p.m. at 12815 North Cave Creek Road. For more information, visit the Facebook event page. Laura Latzko

Curling leagues and Learn to Curl classes are found in Tempe at the Coyotes Curling Club.
Curling leagues and Learn to Curl classes are found in Tempe at the Coyotes Curling Club.
Courtesy of Coyotes Curling Club

Newbie Night
Just because Phoenix New Times has teamed up with Tempe’s Coyotes Curling Club, 2202 West Medtronic Way, for the upcoming Newbie Night doesn’t necessarily mean that getting a perm is officially back in style. No, this is the other type of curling. Not the kind you do at the gym — the other, other type of curling.

It’s the sport that may or may not inadvertently have been invented when a bunch of drunk medieval Scots discovered that it was safer to slide large stones, rather than attempt to hurl them, over bodies of frozen water. Now, curling is an Olympic sport, and the Valley’s premier curling club is inviting you to put your stones on ice, so to speak.

Give it a shot at 6:30 p.m. on Saturday, September 30. The 18-and-over event is $20. Visit the Coyotes Curling website or call 480-447-4559 for details. Rob Kroehler

Return of the Latin Kings of Comedy
Paul Rodriguez and Joey Medina changed the comedy scene by giving voice to the Mexican-American experience on an international level. Their appearances on The Original Latin Kings of Comedy special helped cement their position as two of the top Latino comedians in the stand-up world.

The veteran comedians will perform on Saturday, September 30, as part of the Return of the Latin Kings of Comedy show at Comerica Theatre, 400 West Washington Street. The star-studded lineup will also feature Willie Barcena, a regular on The Tonight Show with Jay Leno; Johnny A. Sanchez, a former cast member on MADtv; and Dennis Gaxiola, a top-tier clean comic.

Tickets start at $25 for the 8 p.m. show. For more information, call 602-379-2800 or visit the Comerica Theatre website. Laura Latzko

Bikini Lounge has both attitude and bamboo.EXPAND
Bikini Lounge has both attitude and bamboo.
Benjamin Leatherman

The Bikini Boogaloo
It’s time to get down at Bikini Lounge. The dive bar has teamed up with The Record Shoppe to bring you a night that’ll spin you right round.

DJ Brent Roy and Rev Psychedelic Sunset will be spinning rare, out-of-print records ranging from garage and rockabilly to northern soul during The Bikini Boogaloo at 1502 Grand Avenue.

There’s no cover for this event, which runs from 10 p.m. until 2 a.m. on Saturday, September 30. For more information, visit the Bikini Lounge Facebook page. Lindsay Roberts

Fans at a 2016 Arizona Cardinals game.EXPAND
Fans at a 2016 Arizona Cardinals game.
Jim Louvau

Arizona Cardinals v. San Francisco 49ers
No Arizona Cardinals fan in their right mind would argue that the team’s offense has been good this season, but things could be worse.

The San Francisco 49ers, for example, failed to score a touchdown in either of their first two outings, registering a total of 12 points through week two of the 2017 season. At least the Cardinals, who tallied 39 points through week two, have a valid excuse for their offensive shortcomings — the absence of their most potent offensive player, David Johnson.

Expect the Cards’ stalwart defense to capitalize on the ineptitude of the Niners offense when they visit Glendale’s University of Phoenix Stadium, 1 Cardinals Drive, at 1:05 p.m. on Sunday, October 1. Tickets are $70 and up. Visit the Arizona Cardinals website or call 623-433-7101 for details. Rob Kroehler

The Phantom Tollbooth makes change.EXPAND
The Phantom Tollbooth makes change.
Tim Trumble

The Phantom Tollbooth
The best children’s books are just plain good books, which is helpful for adults who missed out on them the first time around. Along with an upbeat, palatable moral, Norton Juster’s The Phantom Tollbooth is packed with idiomatic puns, including characters named Faintly Macabre and the Senses Taker.

The story of a bored boy named Milo whose travels show him how school (and, therefore, life) can be more challenging and diverting has been a worldwide favorite since its 1961 debut. Childsplay brings the fantasy to life through Sunday, October 15, at Tempe Center for the Arts, 700 West Rio Salado Parkway. It’s meant for audiences 6 and older. Showtime on Sunday, October 1, is 1 p.m. Tickets are $12 to $30 at the ChildsplayAZ website or 480-350-2822. Julie Peterson

Pumpkin Days and Corn Maze
Whether you’re looking for a scare or some less frightening fall fun, Tolmachoff Farms celebrates both sides of the season.

During the family-friendly Pumpkin Days and Corn Maze festivities, you can traverse either a six-acre or a mini corn maze, visit a petting zoo, take a ride on a pedal-cart track or a train, tear it up on a hay pyramid, and pick a pumpkin. This event runs Tuesday through Sunday, from September 30 to November 5. Admission is $12, and children 2 and younger get in free.

The farm’s AZ Field of Screams attraction features creepy characters waiting for the perfect moment to jump out at and chase you. Prepare to be scared on Friday and Saturday evenings (and Halloween night), from September 30 to October 31. Admission is $20 per person.

Combo passes for both attractions are $25. Pumpkins, train rides, and other things cost extra. The family-owned farm is located at 5726 North 75th Avenue. For more information, call 602-999-3276 or go to the Tolmachoff Farms website. Laura Latzko

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