Soda Drinker Pro Is... A Soda Drinking Simulation

Keep New Times Free
I Support
  • Local
  • Community
  • Journalism
  • logo

Support the independent voice of Phoenix and help keep the future of New Times free.

Humanity has accomplished a great deal in its relatively brief time on this planet. So it's refreshing to see we've even managed to wield technology so advanced that we can properly simulate the act of walking around and drinking a soda.

See Also: -Colbert Struggles With NYC Soda Ban, Conan Offers Alternatives -Oh, My, Bertie's of Arcadia Is Retro-Riffic!

This is the future brought to us by a new game carrying the ever so original title "Soda Drinker Pro." We had a chance to sit down with the game, which is a free download from the creator's webpage, and here are our impressions.

In an email sent to our esteemed colleague, Benjamin Leatherman, the game is described as an, "FPS (First Person Soda) where the player is thrown into a world where they can fully experience soda in every possible way." The creator, Will Brierly, goes on to say, "There is no use in me telling you about it but if you'd like you can experience it fully on your own."

And boy is he right on the money there. Decades of gaming cannot prepare you for the utterly mind warping experience of playing a game in which you wander around a series of square areas sipping on a soda until it runs out. Once it does, you move on to the next level. Controls are handled via the familiar WASD keyboard commands and your sipping is a two-step process involving depressing the left mouse button to raise the soda to your lips and then pressing the right button to commence sipping, with realistic sound effects. You can also pick up bonus sodas which, well you can pick them up.

Mashables has a more in-depth look at this FPS which was apparently created almost a decade ago in a 19-hour coding binge. It sat on the internet, mostly overlooked until a friend wanted to feature it in a Rhode Island art festival. That spurred Brierly to completely rewrite the game in the modern Unity game engine.

Words cannot accurately describe this experience, but perhaps this video will walk you through the fine points. No word yet if New York City Mayor Bloomberg will also ban such an egregious example of pro-soda propaganda.

Follow Chow Bella on Facebook, Twitter, and Pinterest.

Keep Phoenix New Times Free... Since we started Phoenix New Times, it has been defined as the free, independent voice of Phoenix, and we would like to keep it that way. Offering our readers free access to incisive coverage of local news, food and culture. Producing stories on everything from political scandals to the hottest new bands, with gutsy reporting, stylish writing, and staffers who've won everything from the Society of Professional Journalists' Sigma Delta Chi feature-writing award to the Casey Medal for Meritorious Journalism. But with local journalism's existence under siege and advertising revenue setbacks having a larger impact, it is important now more than ever for us to rally support behind funding our local journalism. You can help by participating in our "I Support" membership program, allowing us to keep covering Phoenix with no paywalls.

We use cookies to collect and analyze information on site performance and usage, and to enhance and customize content and advertisements. By clicking 'X' or continuing to use the site, you agree to allow cookies to be placed. To find out more, visit our cookies policy and our privacy policy.


Join the New Times community and help support independent local journalism in Phoenix.


Join the New Times community and help support independent local journalism in Phoenix.