The next time you're bust up laughing after a bawdy female comedienne like Lisa Lampanelli, Whitney Cummings, or Chelsea Handler lays down some of her signature raunch, be sure to thank Andrew Dice Clay after your sides stop hurting. That's because -- believe it or not -- the ultra-lewd and oft-misogynistic outlaw comic, who served the scourge of feminists during his controversy-laden zenith in the early '90s, ultimately helped break ground for such vulgar vixens, some of whom are as crass and crude as The Diceman ever was.
Though Clay has gone through some bad times in the two decades since his heyday, he's been on a major roll the past couple of years. He pulled memorable appearances during the final season of Entourage, debuted a blockbuster Showtime comedy special titled Indestructible in December, and stars in Woody Allen's upcoming flick, Blue Jasmine. And this weekend, the Diceman will cometh to the Valley for a three-night stint at Stand Up Live.
Jackalope Ranch recently interviewed the notorious comic via telephone and learned that he still boasts the same fierce attitude and penchant for unbelievably dirty humor (including his infamous nursery rhymes) as we discussed how women have become as raunchy as him, if not more so.
Why did it take so long for you to do a special? Well, you know, life; let me put it to you that way. Everybody goes through things. In short, I brought up my sons. I got two sons and they actually open the special. They're a rock band [L.A. Rocks], and they're about to get signed because of the special. So, yeah, when I went through certain things in life, I found it more important to bring up my kids and then get back into the career. I always worked but I wasn't making any kind of career moves. And, now, with the success I had on Entourage and a Woody Allen movie I'm starring in with Cate Blanchett and Alec Baldwin and a hip special on the air, things are really cooking.
Did you ever perform in Phoenix back during your heyday? Oh, yeah, I would do the Celebrity Theatre a lot. Actually, when I first got into concerts, Phoenix was the testing ground for Dice. We put one show on sale at the Celebrity and wound up selling out three in that day. So I have a lot of history there. Actually, they call me the "Stripper's Comic" because when I would perform, the owners of strip clubs would close down the club that night and bring all the girls to my shows. So hopefully that's the scenario at Stand Up [Live]. There's nothing like having great-looking chicks sitting in the front row. You know that.
And you love to rip on them. Oh, yeah, even on my special, Indestructible on Showtime, I don't really stick to the script. Pretty immediately I dive into the crowd a little. Most comics, when they do a special, really stick to the script and what they rehearsed, I like to get into the crowd a little, and that's what leads me into my material. I always go into the crowd. Always.
And your crowds don't mind getting ripped on. No. The people coming to see Dice are paying to see me for a reason. I mean, I deliver a certain brand of comedy. It's hardcore, it's sexual, it really riles them up. They really enjoy it. I love it when I get couples in the front row. You got one couple that, let's say, is in their 50s. And then you got the younger demographic, like a guy dating a 28-year-old girl for a year -- it's a great dichotomy what I say to each of those couples.
Are you still as raunchy as ever? Yeah. I have my comedic voice, and you know what? I talk about what I talk about and -- like I said -- it's hardcore. I'm painting very sexual cartoons for people in their mind. I think that's what really makes them laugh at themselves because when you're honest onstage about your material, people grasp that, and it's almost like they're sitting in the audience going, "Oh, so I'm not the only one that that fits." So they can laugh at themselves. But that's what the world is -- it is raunchy.
And vulgar and harsh, to boot. Yeah. Look what goes on. Look at the Internet today. Girls post up pictures of their assholes on Facebook. I mean, that's like their profile pic. And guys do it with their dicks. It's crazy. You're talking about a generation that grew up on porn on the Internet. Everybody's Skype-ing. And they're not Skype-ing to say, "How you doing today." That might be the first thing they say. But by the time you hang up and shut the computer [off], they're naked and drenched in sweat.
And other things. You ever do that? Uh, no. I tried. (Laughs) I maybe Skyped, like, twice. You know, you get into talking to somebody, this was when I was single -- I've actually been married now for like three years -- and trust me, I've got an extremely hot wife. It's the only way to go. But when I was hunting, which is how I look at men and even women today, women have become the hunters. Women today are more aggressive than ever in history because of all this stuff. They compete with each other with the way they dress.
What do mean? The way women dress today. I'm not saying this as a put-down, I waited for this generation. They're really aggressive in their behavior, in their dress code. Everything from the animal prints to the six-inch stiletto heels. They're out there hunting us down now. It's pretty amazing to see that attitude in the world now. And, like I said, I don't say it as a put-down. I like it. I've always liked it, and I always understood it. And when I was with a woman, I would never judge her in the bedroom, because I feel everyone is an individual and have their own wants and fantasies of how they like to go about their, uh, love-making, I'll put it to you that way because its a newspaper.
Women can be as bad as men these days, if not more so. That's exactly what I'm talking about. Years ago, it was just the guys out there hunting, and women had to play it off like, "That's not who I am " -- until they're behind closed doors. Today, they let you know exactly what they are, because they don't want any misunderstandings once they are with you alone. And a lot of guys' mentalities are stupid, because they meet a girl, they go over to her because they're attracted to her, [and] now when that girl does everything they want on the first date, they don't want to see her again because, "Well, she did everything." And I've had those conversations with friends and go, "Well, isn't that what you wanted?" Because she wants it as much as you, and now you're gonna lose a great chick because she did what you wanted her to do, which is stupid thinking.
Have you seen that HBO show Girls, which can be really raunchy? Never seen it, but Sex in the City started that. That was the show that opened it up for women. You would see them bring a guy home and have sex the first night. But I'm into that. I have no problem with that, and I never did.
What's your opinion on female comedians who are as raunchy -- if not more -- as you were back in the day? You know, my opening act is a female comic, her name is Eleanor Kerrigan and she'll be with me [at Stand Up Live] in Phoenix. And to me, she's one of the top female comics in the country. She hasn't done a special yet, but I'm sure she will. And she's just amazing, and she's an attack dog on stage. And she's good-looking, sexy, and she has no fear up there. So I don't have a problem with girl comics. Years ago, I [thought] girl comics weren't funny.
How come? The reason they weren't funny is because they were holding back. You know what I mean? Today, they don't hold back. It's just like the sex thing. So when they're on stage, if they're any good, they're open-minded and their material fits the times we're living in. And that's what Eleanor does.
Did all the drama and controversy that you went through back in the early '90s help pave the way or open things up for raunchy female comedians? You know, that's what a lot of people tell me, and that's a pretty cool thing. And this history I have of selling more tickets than any comic ever in history is a pretty cool thing, too. There's a book being written about it now. I'm working with the writer and editor David Ritz, who's basically written about rock stars his whole life, but he's doing my book.
Back in the day, you were the enemy of feminists everywhere. Yeah, but look what you're talking about, feminists. I'm talking about real women.
But to hear you talk about how women are more empowered with their sexuality sounds pretty pro-female. I always was [this way]. I just really liked sex and wasn't afraid to talk about it on stage. Like I said, years ago, a lot of women would have to try to hide the beasts within themselves. Today, they sit in the front row wearing a zebra dress and a cheetah thong to go with it. So they've come a long way as far as their attitude.Do you still do those certain nursery rhymes?
Yeah, you gotta do the classics. For sure. Even in my special, I did them, because I'm one of those comics that has these almost like anthems at the end of the show. And the fans love doing 'em with me, and I like doing it for them. It's like going to see going to see your favorite rock star or singer. I wouldn't want to go see Billy Joel and not hear "Just the Way You Are." You wanna hear the hits on top of the new stuff, and that's what I try to give the fans. I have all the material in the world, but their are still classic bits. Because they go absolutely nuts for that.
Are you still as fierce as ever on stage? Well, I'm what you'd call an angry comic, for sure. Like I said, I'm a certain brand, and when I come up with bits, I deliver it a certain way. It's very street level. I've never changed my way as a comic. There are cleaner comics in this world, and I'm not one of them. We live in a dirty world with a lot of filthy things going on, and I get into that. I talk about the Internet. I talk about the new generation of women versus the older generation of women. I talk about technology. I talk about how with the Internet, yeah, you might go on to check your e-mails, but we know you're really going to those porn sites. I know how people think and I call them on it.
What pisses you off these days? I'm talking about the act. I don't walk around pissed off. On stage, I'm a certain kind of animal and I unleash myself on the crowd.
Okay, what pisses off the Diceman these days? Well, I'm not gonna do the whole act for you on the phone. That's the reason people come and see me perform live. To start doing my material would be stupid.
The Diceman is still a showman, right? Completely rock 'n' roll? A hundred percent.
Andrew Dice Clay is scheduled to perform from Thursday, February 28, to Saturday, March 2, at Stand-Up Live in Downtown Phoenix. Performance times vary. Admission is $35.
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