Lists

10 Things People From Phoenix Need to Stop Complaining About


Complaining is an American pastime, especially here in Phoenix.

That said, here are some things we all really need to stop complaining about:


10. Drivers

Have you ever been to another city? The drivers suck there, too. We're not special. Though we do have more self-driving crashes. 

9. That Everything's Beige

People hate beige until the neighbor paints her house teal. Suddenly, beige can look very good.


8. Immigrants

 Relax. No one's taking yer jerb. If they are, you probably should have stayed in school past eighth grade.



7. The Sports Teams

They don't always suck. The Diamondbacks are still one game out of first in the NL West as of this writing, the Cardinals are rebuilding, the Suns have a bright future, and the 'Yotes – well they didn't finish dead last in the NHL last season, so there's that. At least we have the Mercury and Rattlers.


6. It's Boring

You're boring.

5. Old People

Guess what. You're going to be old someday, too. So be nice to the elderly. 

4. When It Rains

UGH I CAN'T BELIEVE IT RAINED AGAIN. Stuff it! You should love the freakin' rain in this desert.

3. Snowbirds

Do you like money? Snowbirds give us theirs. And they leave as soon as the mercury cracks 85.


2. Traffic

Phoenix has better traffic than any other big city in America. Try living in L.A. or Boston, ya nitwit! Here, you can often see mountains while stuck on the highway, or at least funny signs from ADOT. 

1. The Heat

OMG DOES IT GET ANY HOTTER?!

IT ALWAYS GETS HOTTER. PLEASE SHUT UP.

BONUS COMPLAINT: "My skin is dry!"

Solution: Buy some lotion.

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Matthew Hendley
Contact: Matthew Hendley
Dillon Rosenblatt was the social media editor at Phoenix New Times from 2016 to 2018. Originally from New Jersey, he is a graduate of Arizona State University's Walter Cronkite School of Journalism and Mass Communication.