There are a few things that are almost guaranteed to happen during St. Patrick's Day: funny hats and green beads will be worn by many a bar patron, bad imitations of Irish accents will be proffered by the inebriated, and endless gallons of emerald-colored beer will be quaffed.
Such things are de rigueur for the Irish holiday and can likely be found at almost every single green-themed party and gathering in metro Phoenix that will take place from Friday, March 14, until Monday, March 17.
See also: St. Patrick's Day Guide 2014
However, if you want something more out of your St. Pat's experience -- like the chance to party with a leprechaun, imbibe fine imported spirits, or score primo prizes -- then head for any of the following 14 shindigs and Celtic craics where you can swing your sheleighly.
Verne Troyer might be less than half your size, but the diminutive actor is twice the party animal that you'll ever be. Seriously. The thespian, best known as Mini Me from the Austin Powers films, can reportedly go quite hard. And if you'd like to spend your St. Patrick's Day partying alongside the dude, he'll make a special appearance at McFadden's party on Monday, March 17, for photo ops and autographs starting at 6 p.m. Tickets are is $10.
Speaking of lively little people, Chuey the Rock 'n' Roll Midget will be dressed as a leprechaun and pouring drinks behind his proportionately sized bar at Giligin's during its Saint Patrick's weekend block party. The four-day rager will run daily from Thursday, March 13, to Sunday, March 16, and include green beer, karaoke, street games, prizes, giveaways, and a "best leprechaun" contest. Hours are from 11 a.m. to 2 a.m. each day. Admission is free.
You can get in twice the partying vice on Saint Patrick's Day thanks to this landmark downtown Phoenix pub. The $10 cover not only gets you into Seamus' raucous street party -- which attracts hundreds every year -- but also includes admission to the fête happening at Rosie McCaffrey's. Each celebration will feature live music, drink specials, Irish-style eats, and giveaways. Hours are 10 a.m. to 2 a.m.
A total of four Mill Avenue bars are teaming up and going wild out for the St. Patrick's Day Block Party on Monday, March 17. Patrons can move between El Hefe, Handlebar, Fat Tuesday, and Public House on Sixth via the adjacent back patios of these joints. Multiple DJs will drop block-rocking beats both inside and out, and several bars will be serving beer and booze. Consider it four different parties in one. Admission is free before 7 p.m. and $10 afterwards.
You can score more than Irish libations at either the CityScape or Tempe Tilted Kilt during the four-day St. Patrick's fêtes that will transpire from Friday, March 14, until Monday, March 17. Several 40-inch HDTVs will be awarded to lucky patrons over the weekend and on the holiday, as will plenty of "Kilt Kash." Deals like four drinks or beers for $4, DJs, and other fun is also planned. Parties at both locations run from 11 a.m. to 2 a.m. daily. There's no cover.
As if you couldn't tell by his tats -- which include the Notre Dame Fighting Irishman -- House of Pain rapper Everlast is a proud son of the Emerald Isle. He's also known to be a bit rowdy, which we hope will result in an off-the-hook affair and, dare we say, a lot people jumping around during his special DJ set at Maya's weekly Sunday Phunday party on March 16. Doors open at 9 p.m. Admission is $10.
A foursome of fêtes are scheduled to transpire at McFadden's, kicking off on Friday, March 14, with drink specials, giveaways, and other fun. The revelry continues on Saturday, March 15, with the St. Practice Party, which will feature cash prizes for the sexiest green outfit, a Lucky Charms eating contest, and maybe a leprechaun or two. An Irish brunch with live music from The Sea Merchants is planned on Sunday, March 16, from 11 a.m. to 4 p.m., followed by happy hour food and drink specials until 7 p.m. The biggest party of the weekend, however, will go down place on Monday, March 17, with live music and more leprechauns, and two free drinks for anyone named Patrick. It's open until 2 a.m. each day. Admission is free.
It probably wouldn't be a Saint Patrick's Day in the Valley without a visit from the Celtic rockers of Flogging Molly and one of their boisterous outdoor shows. Good thing their continuing the tradition once again this year with a stop in Tempe on their yearly Green 17 Tour on Monday, March 17. It's as much a rowdy party as it is a concert, complete with food and beer trucks, vendors, and other St. Pat's staples. Ozomatli and local heroes Roger Clyne and the Peacemakers are also scheduled to appear. Gates open at 4 p.m. Tickets are $35 in advance, $40 day of the event.
An enormous St. Patty's party is being planned at the Firehouse's Tempe location on Monday, March 17. Highlights include $3 beers until 10 p.m., $4 wells drinks, and half-price appetizers until 8 p.m., multiple DJs in the mix, and plenty of co-eds in attendance. Starts at 9 p.m. Admission is free.
If you're anywhere within a 10-mile radius of this Tempe institution, it's incredibly likely that you'll swing by for a pint or three. It's a preferred drinking destination for countless others on Saint Patrick's Day, as well as Flogging Molly fans looking to keep the party going after leaving Tempe Beach Park (probably because the Celtic rock band has hung out here after their gig). Casey's will be offering its usually lengthy list of libations on Monday, March 17, as well as promos, giveaways, food, and drink specials. Hours are from 10 a.m. to 2 a.m., and there's no cover.
Saint Patrick's Day parties don't get any bigger than the one that goes down every year at Padre Murphy's in Glendale. An 18,000-square-foot tent will be set up in the parking lot and host live entertainment in the form of bands, dance troupes, jugglers, and other performers. Green beer will be in abundance (natch) as will numerous spirits, prizes, giveaways, and food. Gates open at 10 a.m. Admission is $10 after 1 p.m., $15 from 6 p.m. onward. Call 602-547-9406.
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The St. Patrick's Day revelry will take place both inside and outside of R.T. O'Sullivan's on Monday, March 17, and will include any combination of the following: bag pipers, Irish step-dancers, drum corps, fiddler duos, and other live entertainment. If traditional sounds of the Emerald Isle ain't your bag, local rock bands Los Guys and Tramps & Thieves will perform starting at 8 p.m. The party runs from 10 a.m. to 2 a.m. Admission is free.
Feast on corned beef and cabbage, Smithwick's, and the other delights of the holiday in the great outdoors at the St. Patrick's Day Festival that will be held in the Murphy's Law parking lot and portions of the adjacent AJ Chandler Park on Saturday, March 15. An all-day slate of live music both traditional and otherwise is planned -- including performances by Kung Fu Grip, DJ Q Ward, Chuck E. Baby and the All-Stars, and Arizona Fire Service Pipe Band and others. More than 50 vendors will be there, promos from Guinness and Coors Light will be given away, and Mike G. from Hot 97.5 will host a bikini contest at 8 p.m. Runs from noon to midnight. General admission is $10 and VIP access is $75.